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Friday, May 31, 2013

True Confessions by a P0rn Addict woman

Confession: My name is Feminista Jones and I love
watching pórn. Pórn in this instance refers to séxually
explicit videos featuring men and women engaging
in various types of kínky, séxy activity. I'm not a fan
of magazines and still images, but I absolutely love
watching people get it on. I've opened up about my
voyéurism, and definitely admit that I'm highly
ároused by being able to get a sneak peek into the
séx lives of others. For most people, watching pórn is
about indulging in a fantasy or a séxy illusion that
árouses one's senses. Others just want something
fun to watch or seek to satisfy a língering curiosity.
The longstanding stereotype that pórn is just for men
is simply untrue. Women absolutely do watch X-ráted
movies, and not just the softcóre stuff either.
According to a study conducted by Dr. Gomathi
Sitharthan at the University of Sydney's Graduate
Program in Sexual Health, at least one in three
women watches pórn. She cites Internet accessibility
as one of the contributing factors to the increase in
viewing in recent years. This is true enough, as
anyone can now access hundreds of thousands of
videos via snippet sites that allow users to upload
video clips and share with others for free. And even
despite the ease with which people can now access
these videos, CNBC reports that the pórn industry is
still estimated to take in over $14 billion a year in
revenue.
I became interested in the pórn-viewing habits
of women, especially women of color, because I often
see women and men talk about it with hesitation. I
did a quick survey of my Twitter followers and
received 206 responses to six questions about
viewing habits and preferences.
What Do Women Like to Watch and Why?
Think most heteroséxual women are checking out X-
rated movies primarily to see fit, well-built, séxy
men? Think again. Dr. Meredith Chivers found that
the gender of the participants in pórn didn't matter
much to the women watching. Women respond to
the level of activity before they respond to the
gender of the actors doing the activities, she found.
This might explain why 53% of the women report
enjoying lesbian scenes (at least two women, no men
present) as one of their top three genres. I also found
that 14.5% of the women enjoy wátching gáy scenes
(at least two men, no women present), and 30% of
the women enjoy watching group séx scenes (several
men and women) or gángbángs (one woman, several
men).
The longstanding stereotype that pórn is just for men
is simply untrue. Women absolutely do watch X-rated
movies, and not just the softcóre stuff either.
Women also report enjoying "ethnic" scenes, or
scenes focused heavily on African-Americans and
Latino/a-Americans. This category had the biggest
response, with 68% of the women indicating it is in
their top three favorites. There's a level of cultural
affinity associated with the visual it seems, and if
women are focusing on the fantasy aspect of pórn, it
might be easier to connect to the actors who are of
the same race/ethnicity or women they're used to
seeing in their daily lives.
I also asked the women to choose their top two
reasons for watching these movies. The large
majority (82%) said they watch pórn to masturbaté,
which speaks to the árousing stimulation watching
people have séx provides. The survey revealed that
43.2% of women also thought of pórn as something
simply fun to watch, while 38.3 % of women said
they watch pórn to learn new tricks and techniques.
I'd recommend any woman looking for something
new and éxciting to try in the bédroom to check out
some of those steamy clíps and see what you can
reenact the next time.
What About the Stigma?
Many women feel that pórn degrades women, and
struggle with reconciling the árousal they experience
with the reality of the images depicted. About 32% of
the women surveyed say they avoid pórn that
degrades women, while 27% say they don't feel bad
watching pórn that features women being degraded
because they choose to make the videos. Even more
interesting is that 25% of women say they feel bad
about the women being degraded but are still
ároused, and 21% say they actually get off on the
images of women being séxually degraded.
Approximately 13 million women check out at
least one pórn site per month, according to Nielsen
ratings. "Pórn provides an alternative way for women
to satisfy their curiosity, learn more about séxuality,
and explore séxual desires and séxual positions in
the privacy of their home alone or with a partner,"
says TaMara Campbell. According to my own survey,
50% of women prefer to watch pórn alone, most
likely because they prefer to masturbaté while doing
it.
Of those who do watch with someone else, 74% say
they are comfortable with their preferences and don't
mind sharing with a partner. Further analysis shows
that the remaining women who don't
feel comfortable sharing their preferences with a
partner tend to prefer scenes featuring BDSM/kínk,
gay male séx and taboo situátions (incest, rapé
fantasies, etc).
Women are increasingly taking ownership of
their séxuality and pleasure. They're no longer
waiting for séx to be done to them; they are making
it happen for them in ways that not only get them off
but empower them. Like with anything in excess,
some women can develop addictive habits around
watching pórn, and I caution anyone experiencing
this to reach out and get help. There are many
resources available for people with séxual addictions,
and pórn addiction is a very real issue in
relationships.
That said, women shouldn't feel like they're alone in
their pórn watching or in their preferences. No matter
the scene or the kínk, there are other women out
there enjoying the view just the same and getting
off. Remember to be safe, be aware, and above all
feel free to explore the various cinematic fantasies
that might éxcite you.

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